Survivor 45 - Finale

 

Well, here we are. It’s the end of the season and it’s time for someone to win! Sorry it’s taken so long to get to this. It’s been a busy week and a half!  When last we left, Queen Dee had blindsided Austin and sent Drew (AKA Napoleon Dynamite) had dancing off the stage and into the jury box leaving a Austin, Dee, Jake, Julie and Katurah as the final five. 

 They’re off to a new camp but that’s the least of Sir Austin’s concerns.  He was blindsided by the Napoleon vote  and needs to clear the air with the Queen.  With “Please forgive me” doe eyes, she apologizes and he reacts much better than if the situation had been reversed.  Something to keep in mind off the island, kiddo. The next morning, a puzzle box with a six-digit code appears at camp.  First person to find all three stations, count the items there and use the count to determine the code wins an advantage in the next immunity challenge.  That’s both huge and serious!

 They start out by racing to each station but they are so far apart that most are at a slow jog by the time they hit the 2^nd or 3^rd.  All but Jake (AKA Your Cousin From Boston) are wrong their first time, but the Bostonian, who channels Jayson saying “It’s important to be accurate”, nails it faster than the rest! (Points for “Win a special comp” to Carol!).  

 At the immunity comp, they have to crawl under and obstacle, get a machete and use it to release sandbags, toss the sandbags into baskets which pop up numbers then climb a tower to unlock and solve a 3-tier puzzle. Yeesh, this is complicated. Jake’s advantage is that two of his sandbags are already placed.

 YCFB and the Queen are first to the machetes while Julie pulls up the rear.  He quickly dispatches his only sandbag toss and takes a decent lead, being the first to climb but he forgot the keys and has to go back! That kind of mistake this late in the game should be a death knell!  Sir Austin catches him atop the tower but all of them struggle with it.  Your Cousin From Boston, acting as if he’s downed one too many Sam Adams, misplaces a piece of the puzzle.  His 2^nd big mistake this competition allows Austin to take home the win (Points for “Win individual Immunity” and “Win Individual Reward” to Marissa!).  YCFB is despondent at the two giant mix-ups he made in that competition (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Carol!) but Austin chooses Jake to go with him to the Sanctuary (Points for “Chosen to go on reward by someone else” to Carol!) so at least there’s food in his future.  Austin not choosing his Queen won’t sit well – I hope he has a good reason!

 Back at camp, Katurah Julie and Queen Dee settle on Your Cousin From Boston as the target, as Dee tells us his exit is good for her (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ “to Roberta!) . At the Sanctuary, Austin tells us that he chose the Bostonian because he knows he’ll get every bit of info from him. Sneaky strategy! I love it!  As they eat, it’s beyond frustrating to watch Your Cousin From Boston break Rule #1 and #4 as he can’t help but share that he found an idol.  It’s ok though – he SWEARS Austin to secrecy. For god’s sake….JUST. SHUT. UP.  Austin cheers them both saying they can’t be voted out. They talk target and land on Julie, as both believe she’d win (2x Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Marissa!).   

 A side note:  Julie has done nothing in this game (hahahha) to deserve victory.  I get that the game is more than competition victories, but those competition victories lead to being able to drive your strategy forward.  It seems these days that “The most likable person” is also seen as “The person most likely to win”, which destroys the notion that winning competitions matters.  In fact, it sets up the idea of “Be super nice and align yourself tightly to whoever has the best chance of winning competitions” as the most viable path to winning.  That’s something I hope the shows address at some point. Anyway, back to the game.

 At camp, Sir Austin IMMEDIATELY spills the beans to Queen Dee about Austin’s idol and their vote swings to Katurah. Your Cousin From Boston breaks Rule #1 AGAIN, telling Katurah.  Guy…..guy….it’s a HIDDEN immunity idol.  Hidden. As in secret. As in SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP.  Stupidity like this make sit hard to root for him.  He wants his idol to have “the most possible impact” so he considers saving Katurah because he hasn’t had control the entire time (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Carol!).  Queen Dee shares the news with Julie who doesn’t believe it.   Austin and the Queen re-agree on voting Katurah but Austin doesn’t necessarily see that as what’s best for him. (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Marissa!). She very kindly tells him to do what’s best for him, but she’s voting Katurah.  Meanwhile, Katurah and YCFB swear they are voting Dee.  Is it finally time for Belo to get their shit together? 

 At Tribal, Jeff recounts how badly the Bostonian played the challenge while Julie thinks the bullets are aimed at her tonight.  Queen Dee is asked how she reacts when she hears her name brought up.  I’ll handle that one, Jeff.  “Poorly”.  That’s how she reacts.  Your Cousin From Boston reminds everyone that the game is not “numbers for the first half, relationships for the second half.  It’s both the entire time”(Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Carol!)   

 At the vote, Jake plays his hidden immunity idol….for Katurah! (Points for “Play hidden immunity idol on someone else” to Carol!) and (Points for “Someone plays a hidden immunity idol on you” to Dalphyne!).  The votes are read….Katurah….Jake…Dee….Julie….and……Julie!  Katurah flipped on Jake AGAIN, which was a dumb move per The Quotable Carol, and Julie is voted out (Points for “Received vote against” and “Jury member” to Jen!) and (Points deducted for “The Tribe Has Spoken” against Jen!). 

 

Back at camp, YCFB tells everyone Katurah wanted the Queen, made him swear to vote her and then flipped.  She agrees – she “just couldn’t trust him” and if there’s one phrase that sums up the Belo tribe, that’s the one. She claims if he’d have told her about his move to save her that she’d have voted with him and I call bullshit.  She’d have gone straight to the Queen and shifted the vote onto Jake.  He was stupid to play it on her, but smart not to tell her he was going to do so.

 At the final immunity challenge, they must hold bowls on the end of a pole while maneuvering through a rope course attached to the platform on which they stack the bowls.  One misstep and they all fall.  They filmed this months ago but if I had to complete this challenge, I feel like I’d still be there.  It looks impossible as they drop over and over and over and over again.  Katurah is actively rooting for the Bostonian, realizing how dumb her move was.  As both YCFB and Queen Dee both have 15 bowls, but he’s just a bit behind, he rushes to catch up…and drops! Dee is all alone as Jake breaks the frustration in anger, forcing Jeff to disqualify him.  Never seen that before.  He wallows while Dee slowly but surely finishes the comp.  (Points to Roberta for “Win Individual Immunity Challenge”!).  

 Now that she’s won, she must choose who will make fire. Her only real competition is Austin, so the winning move is to send him into the competition.  That’s a move she’s loath to make, however, as he could use that as feather in his cap if he wins it. This is both the most power, and biggest decision, she’ll have (2x Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Roberta!).  Elsewhere, Your Cousin From Boston laments his fate to Dee, saying none of his plans worked and he wants to make Fire because he needs to control SOMETHING.  (5x (yes, 5x) Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Carol!). I feel for him. Both Katurah and YCFB practice making fire, and neither is good at it as she laments that she’s going to lose because she can’t make fire. (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Dalphyne!)

 At the fire making challenge, Katurah says she’s going to be chosen because Queen Dee doesn’t want her talking at the end, and Sir Austin volunteered but the Queen doesn’t want him to do it.  The Queen, however, has no concerns about YCFB making fire. She doesn’t fear him at all. And she shouldn’t.

 The Queen chooses to bring her knight to the Final Three, leaving YCFB and Katurah to make fire.  Katurah’s self-fulfilling prophecy comes true as YCFB quickly makes a huge fire that burns the rope, sending him to the Finals! (Points for “Win Special Comp” to Carol!) sending Katurah to the Jury (Points for “Jury member” to Dalphyne!)

 

Note:  at this point, they went back to camp and “referenced in this game” so much that I am not going to call out every instance. Scoring was:

• Austin for Marissa: 6
• Emily for Brian: 2
• Dee for Roberta: 1
• Jake for Carol: 1
• Kendra for Ricky: 1
• Doom for Jayson: 1
• Katurah for Dalphyne: 1

 

Similarly, I’ll list the final tally for scoring before the finale votes come in below.  The Jury had some good questions for the finalists.  Crazy Eyes Kendra wanted to “feel your truth”, and truly bought YCFB when he said “there’s nothing in this game I didn’t do” and “even when it was a bad day, I was still on Survivor”.  Katurah talked about facing their fears. Austin was afraid of lying, Dee of backstabbing (a fear which she quickly got over) and Jake was of failing, because not everything goes your way.  That’s an understatement for him.

When Drew asks how the Reba four stayed so strong, Austin takes credit for winning a lot of challenges, Dee for the openness and honesty but she shies away from taking credit for the moves they made.  They debate for a few minutes about the value of being strategic over being emotional and tactical when Emily asked Dee where she used her brain over her heart. Dee’s not good at this part, but Austin came off worse. She’s definitely pulling ahead of him here, and Austin looks like a naïve fool when Dee comes right out and says she lied, and that she did tell Julie about the Emily vote which led to her perfect idol play.

Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” during the jury:

• Sir Austin for Marissa: 5
• Queen Dee for Roberta: 5
• Your Cousin From Boston for Carol: 3
• Crazy Eyes Kendra for Ricky: 2
• Emily for Brian: 1
• Kaleb for Roberta: 1

At this point, it’s Dee’s game to lose.As the votes are read we realize there are only 8 jurors so when the votes come out:

•        Dee
•        Austin
•        Dee
•        Austin
•        Dee
•        Austin

 We’re wondering if there’s ever been a split winner….But we need not wonder.  Dee takes home the last two votes, winning the game! (Points for “Winner” to Roberta!), (Points for “2^nd place” to Marissa!) and (Points for “3^rd place” to Carol!).

Ok Scott, that’s great but what does that mean for our final scores????

Going into the finale, Roverta had a scant one-point lead on Carol with Jen and Marissa near behind.  While Jake blurted out “In this game” an astounding 11 times in 180 minutes, and won two special competitions, it wasn’t quite enough as Dee also blurted out the key phrase 8 times, won individual immunity and won the game meaning CONGRATULATIONS ROBERTA!  YOU ARE THE NEWEST PRETEND POINTS SURVIVOR CHAMPION!

Final scores:

1. Roberta: 96
2. Carol: 93
3. Marissa: 80
4. Jen: 44
5. Scott/Dalphyne: 34
6. Jay: 30
7. Ricky: 26
8. Kristyn: 23
9. Brian: 22

See you all in a few weeks when Survivor 46 kicks off!  Until then, Happy New Year!

Survivor Update: Week 12

With one week to go, it’s still anyone’s game!  Well, anyone named Roberta, Carol, Jen, Marissa, Scott or Dalphyne at least! Nothing personal, everyone else. It’s just that your game is deader than Elvis.  You’ll get ‘em next time!

 Last week, the return to camp was joyous.  They’d just voted Bruce and his idol out and the feeling of team spirit was high.  This week is significantly different as Julie’s perfectly timed Idol play means she’s still there despite getting every vote.

 

 The Reba – Belo war is over, but it’s pretty clear that the Reba civil war has begun.  Julie and Queen Dee think they can “work together in secret” because Tenacious Dee voted for Julie.  Dee’s shocked when Sir  Austin  implies people may not buy her act. Sure they will – as long as everyone forgets the previous 20-ish days.  For a smart person, that’s pretty stupid .  Austin thinks the vote was a disaster. It was – and it was his fault for breaking rule #4.   

 The next morning, Katurah “wants to show her evolution as an impactful player and what she can do” (2x Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Dalphyne!) goes idol hunting but gets caught by Sir  Austin.  So much for evolving into an impactful player.  Perhaps she needs a new Mission Statement.  Julie didn’t sleep and in a move that can only be described as “other-wise”, she confronts Drew (AKA Napoleon Dynamite) while admitting to us that she won’t believe what he says.  They do the liar’s dance about “Reba working together” and having a route forward together but that’s all it is. These two are cooked (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Jen!).  Julie only trusts the Queen, which she should see as dangerous but does not.  I’m going to add this as Rule #5:  Open Your Eyes.  They agree that Napoleon is the ringleader, and the Reba Civil War is well underway.

 At the reward challenge they have to race from the ocean to stand on a barrel which they will roll while standing on it by pulling themselves along a rope course, gather keys and solve a puzzle.  The prize is a helicopter ride to a picnic on a sand bar in the ocean which sounds unbelievable.   Sir Austin takes a quick lead while Katurah’s swimming problems drop her to last.  Austin blows through the course and destroys the puzzle as well (Points for “Win Individual Reward” to Marissa!).  He chooses his queen to join him, of course, and then shockingly chooses Katurah, leaving his #1 Napoleon Dynamite back at camp thinking “Julie and Jake (AKA Your Cousin From Boston) aren’t going to suddenly team up”  (Points for “Chosen to go on reward by someone else” to Roberta and Dalphyne!)

 At camp, Napoleon babysits to make sure Julie and The Bostonian don’t get into too much trouble, but he’s pissed at being left behind.  Julie tells ND she’s going pepper picking which is what all the cool kids call idol hunting these days, and she’s joined by the Bostonian. 

 Your Cousin From Boston realizes there’s only a few days left and that peppers might just grow under rocks or under leaves or in trees which coincidentally is also where hidden immunity idols may live. (2x Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Carol!). As he searches, he laments that the people on reward are all the people he wants to scheme with and that the only way he can win is to get some firepower (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Carol!)  and his wish is granted as he finds a clue! (Points for “Find a clue to a hidden immunity idol” to Carol!).  He quickly finds the location and retrieves the idol, with no one being any wiser! (Points for “Find a hidden immunity idol to Carol!).   He isn’t sure how he will use it yet though, it’s protection and it’s also a resume builder to earn votes (2x points AGAIN for “Reference ‘in this game’ to Carol!)

 Meanwhile, on the way to reward, the chopper flies over the castaway camp and Napoleon Dynamite somehow doesn’t respond with a middle finger.  Queen Dee and Sir Austin hold hands in the helicopter and Katurah sees it.  File that one away for later, eh?    We get Sir Austin’s backstory (he was the introverted chubby kid) at the reward and Queen Dee is all smiles as they inhale their picnic.

 At the immunity challenge, Napoleon kneels so Jeff can take the necklace off.  I’d have made him work for it.  NOTHING IS EASY ON SURVIVOR, JEFF!  For this challenge, they have to put a foot on a beam which holds a ball on a plate. Ball falls, you’re out.  Julie and Jake quickly fall followed soon after by Katurah.  Napoleon is doing some serious gymnastics when his ball finally falls leaving the lovebirds to battle it out.  Austin is playing fair but Queen Dee follows Rule #3: Play to Win and is doing everything she can to trip him up. THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS SMITTEN IN AN IMMUNITY CHALLENGE, JEFF!  At about the 20 minute mark, the Knight final falls leaving the Queen with safety! (Points for “Win individual immunity” to Roberta!).

 At Camp, Dee is ecstatic that she’s going to the Final 5. Sir Austin isn’t upset at his Queen’s reign – he wants Julie out but Your Cousin From Boston isn’t looking that way.  He approaches Julie about blindsiding Napoleon Dynamite, taking ownership of every move made from here on out (Points for “Reference ‘in this game” to Carol!). It’s an easy sale job, she’s still salty about him arranging her blindside and Queen Dee has given her permission to make the move.   Katurah is in on Drew too, but Your Cousin From Boston asks her not to tell the Queen to avoid possible idol plays. It’s the exact same scenario that screwed him in the Kaleb vote, which he recognizes, but he thinks she’s going to stick with it. 

 Flip to Katurah and Dee who do a “On 3, shout who you want out” 1-2-3 “DREW!”.   Sorry Jake, making this move isn’t going to get you the mileage you want.  The Queen sees Napoleon Dynamite as the mastermind of many moves and thinks no one will suspect her since she voted Julie last time (2x Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ to Roberta!).   Tenacious Dee is worried she’s lying to her knight, but she can’t let that stop her.  This is a stark contrast to his thinking last week in the same position.

 Napoleon and Sir Austin think they’ve controlled the votes up til now (2x points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Marissa, single point for me!). Napoleon sees visions of himself in the final 3.  Napoleon….Drew…ask not for whom the karmic bells toll.  They toll for thee.  At the same time, Queen Dee continues lording her immunity win over her knight like the royal witch she is.  She struggles with the idea of telling him about the Napoleon blindside.  She didn’t know who she was going to be before she got here (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Roberta!)  and we don’t get to see what she chooses before tribal.  Austin has an idol that has to be played tonight. If he knows, he could play it for Napoleon….

 At Tribal council, Emily looks 10 years younger!   Julie knew she was being babysat and she didn’t like it one bit despite Your Cousin From Boston and Napoleon Dynamite being cool babysitters who let her stay up too late.  Katurah realizes moves need to be made (Points for Reference ‘in this game’” to Dalphyne!)  and she loves everyone. She doesn’t add “Now that Doom is gone” but I added it here for her.  They talk a lot about the differences between relationships and voting people out, and Queen Dee clearly says nothing is locked in.  Are Julie and Austin paying attention?  I doubt it. Napoleon thinks the game is like limbo – different heights for everyone (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to me!) and Austin agrees as does Your Cousin From Boston who realizes sometimes you have to win a fight (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to Carol!) .

 The question heading into the vote is “Did Dee tell him” and it’s answered when Austin plays his idol…for himself (Points for “Play a hidden immunity idol on yourself” to Marissa!)

 Austin and Drew vote for Julie while the other four vote for Naopleon. He’s voted out by a 4-2 margin becoming the 5^th member of the jury and ending my game. (Points for “Receive vote against” to Jen and me! ), (Points deducted from “The Tribe Has Spoken” against me) and (Points for “Jury Member” to me!)

 So in the same exact situation, Queen Dee followed Rules #1 and 4 and her blindside worked.  They’re not rules for fun, folks!  They’re sent to a new camp for the final push to the end.

 But what does that mean for our game? Jake, your cousin from Boston, had a HUGE week racking up  13 points and jumping into 2^nd place right behind Roberta as they both leapfrog Jen into the top 2 spots.  Marissa also took a huge jump thanks to Austin’s victories and idol plays and now finds herself in 4^th place just a few points out as we head into finale night.  One week to go!

 

Current scores:

1. Roberta: 48
2. Carol: 47
3. Jen: 41
4. Marissa: 40
5. Scott: 34
6. Jay: 28
7. Dalphyne: 24
8. Kristyn: 23
9. Ricky: 22
10. Brian: 19

 

Survivor Update: Week 11

There is joy as the castaways return to Mudville, the mighty Doom has fallen!  Katurah can’t believe Doom didn’t play his idol.  Why? How can that be?  Emily breaks Rule #1 (STFU) and shares she convinced Doom that Julie was playing him like Kellie did and that she’s gathered the non-Rebas to make him believe he was safe so he wouldn’t play it.  Rulebreaking has its costs, Emily.  At the beach, the Rebas commit to a Final Four – which they can force if they stay together – and take people out like the mafia.

Queen Dee, The Tenacious and her knight, henceforth named Sir Austin grow closer on the beach as he regales her with the tale of Boston Rob and Ambuh which leaves the Queen starry eyed about his calming presence (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ “to Ricky!).  They’re totally into each other, something Drew (AKA Napoleon Dynamite) and Julie should take note of.  Meanwhile, Jake (AKA Your cousin from Boston) is sad about receiving so many votes (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ ” to Carol!). He wants Katurah to help him upset the apple cart but she doesn’t know what that means, which makes me feel both old and superior.  Then she tells her backstory about being lesbian, growing up in a cult, and not being allowed to go to school and how she overcame that to become a lawyer and I feel awful and am rooting for her. Thanks, Katurah! (Points for “Reference ‘lgbt or race’ to Dalphyne!). 

 A boat arrives to take someone on a journey and while Your Cousin From Boston wants to go, it’s Emily who winds up taking the ride thanks to random chance.  She recounts how her approach and conversations have grown and changed during the trip, but when she gets to the puzzle she decides not to risk her vote and sails on bock.  No one will believe she did that until they watch it on TV – I know I wouldn’t.  At camp, Emily being gone means she immediately becomes the target for Julie and Katurah, but that wily Katurah spins Jake and Napoleon Dynamite into going for Julie instead. Katurah wants to enlist Austin as well, but this breaks Rule #4 (Know Your Audience). He’d says he’d do it but it will crush his burgeoning showmance with the Queen. .  Katurah makes him swear he won’t tell the Queen `but there’s no way that’ll hold. Now that he knows the plan, he realizes giving Julie his idol is problematic.

 At the individual immunity and reward challenge, they have to untangle and gather rope, go over obstacles and throw sandbags at blocks. The blocks then complete a 2-sided puzzle.  Drew gets to the sandbags first but he’s so bad he deserves to be in this video, finishing first only thanks to his huge lead.  He quickly solves the puzzle but can’t make it stay in place while Austin catches up.  Austin figures out the puzzle but doesn’t realize it’s got to be right on both sides, despite Jeff saying it right to him several times.  Finally, Napoleon Dynamite solves the puzzle and makes it stick! (Points for “Win individual immunity” and “Win individual reward” to me!). Austin finally realizes he has to check the back and laughs at himself.  ND gets to choose two people to go with him on the reward, and decides to make it another boy’s night (Points for “Chosen to go on reward by someone else” to Carol and Marissa!)

 At camp, the girls give themselves sand facials and agree that Your Cousin From Boston is the target while all knowing it’s either Julie or Emily.   At the reward, the boys grossly overeat and settle on Julie, but Austin is only mouthing the words.  When the guys return, Napoleon reminds us that we’re in the stage of the game where every move hurts (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’” to me!) and Austin knows that blindsiding his Queen by voting Julie will ruin his relationship, but telling Dee can scuttle the plan. They didn’t need him to get Julie out. Katurah really blew it by bringing him in to this plan.

 When they finally have some alone time, he breaks both Rule #1 and #4 and tells his Queen everything, trusting that she’ll keep the secret from her close ally.  Do I need to say it? Do I?  Probably not but I will anyway.

 OF COURSE, SHE’S GOING TO TELL JULIE!

  Ok, now that’s out of the way Dee reminds us this is a big decision (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ “to Ricky!) and that her knight trusted her with this information.  But naturally, Queen Dee breaks Rule #1 and tells Julie who is PISSED OFF.  I get that too – they made a final four deal that day!

 And so, the maneuvering begins. 

• Julie tries to enlist Emily and the Bostonian against Austin if they can get Katurah. 
• Emily tells Napoleon and Sir Austin about Julie’s plan.
• Austin brings the Queen into the loop. 
• Austin doesn’t believe his Queen would betray him by telling Julie, but I say nay nay!
• Queen Dee tells Julie for the same reason Austin told Dee!
• Julie throws out going after Sir Austin to Queen Dee, but she won’t do it because “He’s my #1”. 
• I’m sure that’ll land well with Julie
• The Queen wants Julie to vote Emily out, but Julie is salty against Austin.  Who she votes for might be the only vote!  

At tribal, Julie observes that the cutting the first few people to make jury hurts but “at some point, you have to give yourself permission to play (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ “to Jen!). A bad sign for Austin, but Emily remarks that there many full bags have been brought to tribal as no one feels safe.  Napoleon Dynamite comments that Doom’s defeat was an inflection point, a new point of history (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ “to me!). Julie notes that they’re past the “not just me” point but who they want to go to the end with, to which Emily responds that sometimes the game rips your heart out.  (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ “to Brian!). Sir Austin finishes the commentary with ‘we are all such fans that ending someone else’s game is hard’. Indeed (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ to Marissa!)

 

At the vote, they do something I cannot recall ever seeing before and show everyone voting for Julie.  Katurah remarks “If this doesn’t work, I blame Austin and his stupid emotional heart”. Sorry, kid.  You should’ve known better. The plan to get Julie worked…until…Julie stands up. (Points for “Play a hidden immunity idol on yourself” to Jen!).  Julie gets 6 votes, none of which count against her but do for us (Points for "Receive vote against" for Jen!).  She cast the only vote that matters, and it’s Emily who’s sent packing (Points for “Received vote against” and “Jury Member” to Brian!) and (Points deducted for “The Tribe Has Spoken” against Brian!). So much for Emily’s winner edit.

 Julie followed Dee's wishes. The Queen wins again, though this time I suspect there will be no joy in Mudville upon their return to camp. Will the Reba 4 stay together to take out Katurah and Your Cousin From Boston?  Or will the backstabbing begin?  And what does that mean for our scores?  

 Thanks to Julie receiving so many votes, and playing an idol on herself, Jen jumps into first place! All while Drew’s Immunity and reward win moves me into the middle of the pack.  Unfortunately for Brian, his inaugural season ends with Emily’s early departure.  See you next season, my friend!

 Current scores:

1. Jen: 40
2. Roberta: 38
3. Carol: 34
4. Marissa: 29
5. Scott/Jay: 28
6. Kristyn: 23
7. Ricky/Brian: 22
8. Dalphyne: 21

 

 

 

Survivor Update: Week 10

 

Last week we saw Kendra receive a spiritual awakening of her aura or something as she realized people can lie on Survivor about 5 minutes before she was voted out.  What’s in store this week?

 Back at merge camp, Jake (AKA your cousin from Boston) can’t be happier that Kendra is gone because it means he’s still here (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ to Carol!). Meanwhile Drew (AKA Napoleon Dynamite) thinks he’s only bumming through the game. That’s what it looks like to the outside when your tribe isn’t a strong unit like Reba is.  He thinks Bruce (AKA Dr. Doom) is more interesting because he has an idol which he wants to flush, but that damn Doom won’t stop winning immunity!

 Reba are as tight a foursome as I can think of but Julie’s not a fan of the lying and betrayal which makes me wonder if she ever watched the show before appearing on it.  Katurah sees how tight Reba is and tries to marshal Jake, Doom and Emily to fight back as a foursome but Emily’s only mouthing the words.  She sees that the former Belo’s as unable to work together. She’s right – they can’t – but she’s got her work cut out for her if she wants to split Reba.

 Meanwhile, Dr. Doom tells Katurah a story about giving his idol to Kellie before she got voted out. He’s trying to throw people off the scent of his idol so they can get Reba to vote for him, he can surprise play his idol and they can pick off someone in Reba. Katurah buys it until he comes clean.  Theory proven, Doom sells it to Jake with the idea that he’ll leak it to Reba.  It’s a decent enough plan but now that Katurah knows the truth, it requires her keeping her mouth shut to protect Doom. There’s just no way that’s happening.

 At the reward challenge, the castaways have to race through obstacles to collect balls and then navigate the balls through a labyrinth maze.  Winner goes to the Sanctuary for some turkey, mashed potatoes and they spend the night there!   Austin is first to the keys but your cousin from Boston passes him at the knots.  Somehow, out of nowhere, Emily catches up and passes Austin to win her first individual competition!  (Points for “Win individual reward” to Brian!).  Emily chooses Julie, Dee (AKA Queen Dee, the Tenacious) and Katurah to go to the Sanctuary with her (Points for “Chosen to go on reward by someone else” to Roberta, Jen and Dalphyne!). 

 At the Sanctuary, Emily admits she was always taking all the girls on a spa-day. She’s so happy and I love it.  Somehow, she’s gone from so completely insane I drafted her hoping she’d get me a ton of votes before being kicked out to becoming a fan-favorite I can root for.  I hope it’s a real change and not just clever editing.   Anyway, as predicted Katurah comes clean about Bruce’s idol lie.  I get how much she hates him but the four non-Rebas stand a much better chance united than separate and she can’t see it.  That said, he is a strong player and this is a good way to get rid of him. I’m not sure if either option (ally with Bruce or backstab him) is “good” or “better”.  The girls then get letters from home prompting stories, tears are reminders of why they need to win (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ to Jen and Dalphyne!)

  At the merge camp, it’s total boys time which naturally includes fart talk. It’s been a guy thing my entire life but I didn’t get it when I was kid and I don’t get it now.  They show the guys bro-ing out, which in itself is funny, but I am literally laughing out loud when “Playing with the boys” (the Top Gun volleyball scene song) starts playing.  Perfect! 

 

 Doom and Jake talk about taking a shot at Tenacious Dee. While he agrees to Doom’s face, like Kellie before him, Jake can’t wait to unhitch himself from Doom.  When they are out of him presence, Jake spills Doom’s idol story to Napoleon and Austin who totally buy it. Emily and the girls return leavingme wondering how long Doom’s story will hold up.  She tells Napoleon and Auston (her pseudo-alliance mates) they’re not the targets and the Doom is lying about the idol. There it is.  Emily tells Jake if Doom plays his idol, he’s the fallback vote.  He tries to move her to vote Napoleon Dynamite but she won’t budge, and neither will Julie.  Is he seeing how tight Reba is yet?  Napoleon gets wind of Jake’s attempts to swing the vote on him and the two fall out, badly. So much for “Bro-ing out”.

 At the immunity challenge, they get some sun in Fiji lying out on a slide while holding progressively smaller handholds.  Katurah is terrified of falling into the water which seems like an odd fear at this point of the game.  Drew drops amongst all of the girls leaving Austin, Jake and Doom to battle it out Can he win his third straight immunity?  Jake is fighting for his life but his body doesn’t seem to care. He drops leaving Austin and Doom alone on the slides. Unfortunately for Doom, his age and determination only go so far – he drops making Austin the winner (Points for “Win individual immunity” to Marissa!).

 Back at camp, Doom is definitely here tomorrow because he’s playing his idol tonight meaning Jake will be the ricochet vote. Emily concocts a plan to keep Doom’s idol in his pocket and send him packing. She  tells him what he should already know: Julie isn’t with him and that the four non-Rebas will all vote Julie.  Your cousin from Boston has his 2^nd falling out of the episode when he confronts Doom’s lie about giving Kellie the idol.  Doom assuages Jake’s hurt feelings saying Jake is safe because Reba’s going to split the vote. He’s wrong and it doesn’t take.  Jesus, he’s bad at this.  Maybe I should’ve named him Dr. Doomed.

 At Tribal, there’s a different energy now that Doomed doesn’t have immunity.   Jake feels like a pariah because he doesn’t know what’s happening a lot of the time. He’s missing stuff and it bothers him but the stuff he’s missing? Maybe he’s too hungry or sleep-deprived to notice but It’s sitting right in front of him in the jury box.  First Kaleb then Kendra. He knows he’s a target and that Doomed is too.  It’s clear that non-Belo’s realized they held no alliance to each other, broke them apart and are picking them off one-by-one.  Doomed thinks every word said can affect something down the road but he’s going to do everything he can to stay (Points for “Reference ‘in this game’ to Jay x2!).  Everyone calls out Doomed’s idol, they know he has it and he should realize his lie didn’t hold.

  At the vote, for reasons known only to Doomed, production and God, HE DOESN’T PLAY HIS IDOL.  When Doomed’s name comes up, the jury jumps in shock.  Jake gets three votes, Julie gets one and Doomed gets the other four.  Doom is voted out with an idol in his pocket becoming the fourth member of the jury.  Emily’s plan worked to the tune of “Christmas came early today”!  She has now attained the rank of Master!  (Points for “Receive vote against” to Jay, Carol, and Jen!), (Points for “Jury member” to Jay!) and (Points deducted for “The Tribe Has Spoken!” and “Voted out with an idol in hand” from Jay).

  

 

(Points for “Survive week on active tribe” to Marissa, Brian, Carol, Roberta, Dalphyne, Jen and me!)

 Sweet Jesus, he was one of the worst players I’ve seen. He had no read on anyone at all. He thought he was aligned with Kellie, Julie and Jake all of whom couldn’t stand him.  Didn’t see Reba’s steamroller at all and finally let himself get convinced not to play his idol despite his insistence that he would.  It’s a good thing for Jay there aren’t more “I’m an idiot” categories because he’d likely have found those too.

 But what does this mean to us? Roberta's lead shrinks as Carol takes a big jump into 2^nd thanks to her cousin from Boston’s constantly being targeted in this game while Marissa, Brian and Jen gained some ground as well.  Doomed’s bonehead non-idol play leaves Jay only gaining a point due to point deductions. All that and more in the current scores:

 

1. Roberta: 34
2. Carol: 31
3. Jen: 30
4. Jay: 28
5. Marissa: 26
6. Kristyn: 23
7. Ricky: 22
8. Brian: 19
9. Dalphyne: 18
10. Scott: 15