Welcome back to Pretend Points BIIIIIIIIIG BROTHER! When last we left, Lisa, Kimo and Kenney were put on the block by OMGOMGANGELA, which was surprising because she seemed to think Matt had threatened her during their conversation in the HOH room. He did but, as goofy as he is, it’s possible he didn’t realize it.
We pick up on Wednesday with Angela in the opening
vignette (2 points for “Speak in opening vignette” to Brian!) and
she kicks us off saying Kenney is her target but she’s still threatened by Matt
because…wait for it…he didn’t give her a post-veto ceremony hug. Memo to
Angela: Never ascribe to malice that which can be adequately
explained by stupidity.
Kimo and Lisa both shed some tears at being nominated (1
point each for “Shown on camera crying” to Tessa and Demi!), and both
are convinced they have to win the veto (1 point each for “’mention I
have to win << comp name >> to Tessa and Demi!) and
Lisa feels backstabbed because she doesn’t know everyone hates her.
Angela convinces herself the house is on her side with nominations, except for Matt because he didn’t hug her. Didn’t his psychic powers tell him he should be grateful to not have been nominated??? In the HOH room, she goes off on a rant to Joseph and Chelsie, making fun of his eyes. She spends an awful lot of time up there alone obsessing over him.
Meanwhile, Matt and Makensy make goo-goo eyes at each other (SWIDT?) and they form a three-person alliance with Leah named “The Throwmance” (3 points for “Come up with a formal alliance name” to Teresa!), (6 points to Carol, 3 points to Teresa for “Be part of a formal alliance”!) Now that they’ve solidified their alliance, Makensy breaks Rule #1 and tells them about her power. At the same time, Quinn creates a 7-person alliance with Cam, Joseph, Cheslie, Kimo, T'Kor and Angela called The Collective (3 points for “Come up with a formal alliance name” to Demi!), (6 points to Tessa, 3 points each to Brian, Demi, Viviana, Evan, Joe for “Be part of a formally named alliance”!).
And then everything goes sideways. And I mean….off the wall,
off the other wall, off the stone guy in the corner and up into space looney
toons.
Self-isolated in the HOH room, Angela obsesses over Matt
having a good time and convinces herself he's starting a war with
her. She also doesn’t trust The Collective alliance that Joseph and
Quinn just included her in.
“Why doesn’t she trust her allies?”, you may ask.
“Don’t look for logic when crazy is in play”, I say, “and
it’s definitely in play”.
She goes from “The alliance is just trying to keep me
comfortable” to “I have no power or control” to “I WONT GO DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT”
to muttering Latin incantations while holding a voodoo doll of Matt she made
with some Fritos and bits of hair pulled from the HOH room shower. I may have
embellished that last part, but not by much. She wants to “crucify crazy-eyes”
(her words, not mine).
And then, she emerges from her room and EXPLODES. From the stairs between the HOH room and kitchen, Angela delivers one of the all-time great rants. She’s flattered, you see, that she was such a threat to Matt (who has no idea they were even in a fight) and calls him Crazy-Eyes in front of everyone.
Now, I’m thick skinned when it comes to insults but how
anyone could hear what she said and not get pissed about it is beyond me.
Where is the “Just happy to be here” camp mom???
She also goes off on her “alliance”, saying their
performance was good for a low-budget movie. Everyone is stunned. Then
she goes off on Makensy saying she can do better than “Crazy-eyes”.
Leah’s jaw is on the floor as Angela finishes with how she’s “trying to be
mature about this and it brings Makensy to tears. (1 point for “Shown
on camera crying” to Teresa!). Joseph finishes the segment perfectly
“I think that’ll make the episode” deadpan.
Indeed.
Interlude: I always say no one should ever share
whether they have a secret power. That’s
why it’s Rule #1. Why, you ask? Picture
yourself as Quinn watching the only person you told about your secret power
melt down in front of everyone. Then picture her actions if you get on her
bad side.
Just. Shut. Up.
Somehow, they resume normalcy and pick players for the
veto. Since 4 are already set (HOH+3 nominees), Angela picks the
remaining two, and it’s Joseph and Brooklyn (1 point for “Picked for
veto via random draw” to Evan) and (2 points for “Picked for
veto via Houseguest Choice” to Viviana!). Smug Angela is beside
herself that Crazy Eyes doesn’t get to play. She’s insufferable and I hope
she’s a have-not next week.
Matt breaks down at the thought his mom saw how mean Angela
was (1 point for “Shown on camera crying” to Carol!), while (1
point each for “Mention I need to win << comp name >> to
Brian and Tessa!) as both Angela and Kimo assure us of their Veto win
needs.
At the veto, it’s the “spell the longest word” comp with a
twist or two. After 12 minutes of slippery yet sticky slop, Lisa takes home the
victory! (4 points for “Win Veto” to Demi!) and chooses
to use the veto on herself. Unsurprisingly, Matt is chosen as the
replacement nominee. (1 point for “Nominated for eviction” to Carol!)
We pick back up on Thursday and Joseph’s perfect deadpan
opens the show (2 points for “Speak in opening vignette” to Evan!). Angela
thinks Matt has the backdoor coming to him while Kenney is sure he’s still the
target (1 point for “Mention ‘I have to win << comp
name>>’”to Teresa!). Matt's lack of understanding why Angela's
targeting him sends him on a vote-building spree, and leads to the creation of
The Barbershop Alliance which includes Matt, Chelsie, Makensy, Cedric, Cam,
Rubina, Leah and Brooklyn (3 points for “Come up with formal alliance
name” to Carol!) and (6 points for “Be part of a formal
alliance” to Carol!), (3 points each for “Be part of a formal alliance” to Teresa,
Viviana, Joe, Evan and Tessa!) which he hopes will keep him
safe. Their DR sessions don’t seem that promising,
however. Brooklyn, Quinn, and Cedric all think Matt is the bigger
target.
Editorial: I always say
get the biggest target out, and Matt is a bigger target here but after how she
acted, I have a big problem giving Angela what she wants. Maybe it’s just the
contrarian in me, but that would grate against me something fierce.
Meanwhile, T’Kor thinks Kimo should be kept around (1
point for “Mention ‘in this game’” to Joe!”) but Brooklyn and Lisa are
non-committal on whether they’d keep him. Angela then goes off on Kenney
because he might want Matt to win, leading the cop to divulge Matt is his #1
ally. It’s a good thing you retired from undercover work, guy.
Angela can’t believe Kenney doesn’t want to fight against Matt. (1
point for “Mention ‘in this game’” to Brian!). In the DR, Quinn laughs
at Kenney for falling on his sword for Matt. “You’ve known him a
week!”. Kenney is now coming for Angela.
At the AI Arena challenge, the three nominees have to determine which houseguest appears most in series of images. After two very confusing minutes, they all choose a different answer and it’s Kimo who comes away with the right one. (4 points for “Win special comp” to Tessa!). Angela is ecstatic at that result, and I want to throw up. They have a brief minute to convince people for their votes (1 point each for “Mention ‘in this game’” to Teresa and Carol!). In his speech, Matt forgives Angela and she’s so self-centered that she doesn’t understand why.
At the vote, Lisa mentions how good Julie looks (1
point for “Mention “<< X >> is iconic’” to Demi!”).
The votes come out, and much to my chagrin Matt is evicted 8-3 (8
points for “Received vote against” to Carol!), (-2 points for “Evicted” against
Carol!), (6 points for “First person evicted after our game starts”
to Carol!), and (3 points for “Received vote against” to Teresa!).
They put the game first, and I get that. Any other moment
I’d be yelling if they did it the other way, but I hate that Angela got her
way. We close the show as Makensy’s would-be showmance heads out the
door which brings her to tears. (1 point for “Shown on camera crying”
to Teresa!)
What does that mean for our scores? Carol picks up a huge 26 points, moving to 31
on the season thanks to Matt’s alliance and ultimate ouster, while Demi snags
13 more thanks to Quinn’s alliance and Lisa’s Veto win. Tessa
and Brian tie for 3rd with Teresa and Viviana just behind. Don’t give up now, Evan and Joe! You may not
have seen much of your players yet, but you will!
- Carol 31
- Demi 23
- Tessa 20
- Brian 20
- Teresa 16
- Viviana 14
- Evan 11
- Joe 9
No comments:
Post a Comment